Juice: Part 3
I went to bed very early last night so that I wouldn’t think about eating anymore. I woke up at 7am feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. I had a glass of water, I got ready for work, grabbed the afternoon’s juice and headed out.
Once I arrived at work I was still feeling great. Big change from the projectile vomiting that I did yesterday. I was upbeat, positive, feeling good. Then, around 10:30, it started. It wasn’t hunger or a cigarette craving - it was something bigger than that. It was like overnight my hunger and my lust for a cigarette rolled together and combined to create the ultimate pang. It doesn’t even anger me. It makes me desperate.
You know that feeling you get when you’ve been running uphill - the one where you’re so completely exhausted but you know that you only have a short distance left? And then what remains of your inner strength kicks in, you get that boost of adrenaline, and you make it to the top of the hill. This feels like that - only I’m still feeling that exhausted “I don’t know that I can go on” feeling. I keep waiting for that surge of adrenaline.
However, I have reached the point where I think to myself “Fuck this, I’m grown, I’m buying a pack of cigarettes!” But I stop myself. The positive effects of this fast better kick in quickly or I fear that it won’t last much longer… especially when I’m drinking something like I am today. It’s an abominable concoction of broccoli, kale, pepper, tomatoes, carrots, and a splash of lime. I want it to die.
Although I may die right along with it.
